Dipping into the Memory Palace for This One

Recently, I started listening to Josh Widdicombe’s podcast and one of the features on his show is inviting listeners to text in stories of a particular theme. Today, I am starting a new job in a new company and no doubt the stories will pour forth, and my blog trolls will have something else to piss and moan about. Oh also, suck it to all of you who said I wouldn’t find anything after the stunt I pulled at my last job. Two weeks baby, top that.

Of course that particular story that I didn’t post all that long ago, wouldn’t have fit the theme of this particular topic and in either case, the episode I just listened to was posted in 2013. Still, I’ve taken the theme and used it as a writing prompt. Namely: What is a way that you stuck it to your boss but still kept your job.

For example, did you go to the bathroom on company time? Did you sneak a break in on a four hour shift?

In the early days of my adulthood, there was something I did on on company time, knowing I could get away with it. Way back when I was working as a cart jockey at Price Chopper, I would have to go into the next parking lot to get our shopping carts. This parking lot belongs to the SuperMart corporation (Again, obfuscation in case I have to work for them later on) and it’s obscured from the view of the Price Chopper lobby. Although I suppose a camera might be able to see me if our loss prevention guys ever got that bored.

This was also back in the days before I was really conscientious about what I ate. If I had a salad, it was about ten percent lettuce and 90% Italian dressing. Also with my limited budget, the soda machine at SuperMart was a very attractive prospect on a really sweaty day.

So every once in a while, while I was outside gathering carts, I would sneak over there on company time and grab a soda. Then I would proceed to take my sweet time drinking it, because even if someone ratted me out, they couldn’t prove that I wasn’t over there looking for our shopping carts.

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