On the way to the college library this morning, I passed two hooded individuals on Lafayette Street, just a few steps away from Saltonstall School. The geographical location is important only in the sense that if these two are capable of reading and using the most advanced research tool at our civilization’s disposal, I want it known that their idiocy has been documented.
Though I could not properly guess at their ages, I would assume the “gentleman” on the right had the emotional maturity of a fourteen year-old based on the following exchange. He stopped, bent over and pointed.
“Excuse me sir.” He said in a loud dramatic voice, as if he were the headliner at the performance hall where I just happened to be an audience member. “What the fuck are those?”
I followed his not too deceptive line of sight and calmly answered,
“Those are shoes.”
The man righted himself and proceeded to laugh like an idiot as he continued his merry journey. I can only assume that his silent compatriot was too embarrassed to say anything. My advice to him is to distance yourself from someone who makes so obvious a spectacle of himself in public. There’s a fine line between dancing like no one’s watching and dancing like you’re not aware of the breakable china that surrounds you.