The Follow Up

Friday was the day I finally got a follow up on the evaluation I told you all about, as well as my subsequent thoughts on the moment. Strangely enough, I told Ms. Peacock about this evaluation and that is what led to the drama that followed.

As always, with every psychiatrist I speak to, this Doctor screwed up some details. The big one that stood out was when he said, “Nathanielle spent one year at Lyndon State where he was a theater major.”

Hmm, no. I was an education major who switched to English major. I took Theater Arts class in high school and I have a strong inclination towards the performing arts. I even took two acting classes of sorts in the intervening ten years between the one year at Lyndon and now, but I am not sure what led to the confusion over what my actual major was. Mind you, he did most of the talking, and the majority of the time was spent doing those fun tests.

The lady in charge of my case summarized the report. But I won’t go into all of the details here, because I won’t have my copy of the report on hand for some time.

What I will say is that I finally had the sense to call someone out. The caseworker, whom we will call Jane, listened as I told her, at her request, about one of the jobs I enjoyed. I told her about the time I worked for AVEX flight support.

“It was the best job ever. I worked with a group of about four or five people to get the last four planes of the evening ready for the morning. Sometimes we got to watch the in flight movie while we worked and there would sometimes be meals that we could chow down on, since we would have to throw those out anyhow. My supervisors loved my work and I always had support from my coworkers.”

After telling her about my difficulties in my most recent jobs, which just happened to be retail, Jane said, “Well, it seems like you have a lot of difficulty working in retail. You seem to enjoy cleaning, would you prefer janitorial work?”

Wow. That had to be the most radical interpretation of the text ever. I didn’t say, “Cleaning the bathrooms and replacing seat covers in the plane that had the best arguments against serving fish on long flights ever was like kissing the Pope’s ring.” I did not tell her how replacing air sickness bags and vacuuming the carpet was the truest rapture one could legally experience. But instead of getting defensive, I said, “When I described the Avex job, maybe I misrepresented myself.” Then I proceeded to repeat every word I said. I followed it up with, “We’re not going to find the solution to this before I leave the office.”

Jane laughed. I don’t know if she found what I said funny, or if she realized that I was calling her out on her desperate need to seize on the first solution that came to mind. Sound familiar? Either way, I can only hope that we reached an understanding in that moment and that I can look forward to her actually listening to what I say instead of hearing what she thinks I’m saying.

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