Ah, the month of June. Not a snowflake in the sky, yet, nor a drop of rain to mar the scorching heat. But arguments that no one wanted are begun before they have started with the firing of a single passive aggressive shot that will inevitably be heard around the world, if not within the neighborhood.
John sometimes forgets that I am not his roommate. He sometimes forgets that I am a reasonably functioning adult who has, on occasion, shared his bed. He forgets this and he wrings his hands and rolls his eyes when the forgetful act causes me to respond with a fairly appropriate amount of annoyance that only turns nasty when he refuses to acknowledge his part in the drama.
In the refrigerator he has marked a pint of yogurt with a “J”. Because even though he routinely inhales the big pints of yogurt in one sitting, now is the time he feels the need to be concerned. When I buy eggs and bacon, he doesn’t hesitate to eat them, because that’s what I buy them for. But there are times when he finishes them when I’m trying to make them last and that leads to more frustration. Do I put my initials on the eggs I don’t want him to touch? Maybe I should start marking the dish detergent I buy so that he doesn’t dilute it with water when it seems to be running out (but there’s still more than enough to last at least a week).
It wouldn’t be so annoying except that I have been living with him for almost a year now. He forgets that when he asks me to save pickles for him, or tells me that the cheese is for him, I am quite consistent about not eating those things. There they remain until well past their expiration date, because he forgets they are there.
What’s even funnier is when he buys something that he decides he doesn’t like, and then expects me to finish it, because that was the day that I apparently looked and sounded like the garbage disposal.
The summer promises to be a long and fruitful one. This phase of marking the food will pass, only to resurface like the mighty Phoenix. And knowing that John reads this blog and listens to me here more than when I am talking to him directly, will be the assurance I take that the initials that I mark the this relationship with will not F or U.